Single Motherhood: Secrets to Success

Single Motherhood:  Secrets to Success

by Margaret Gaia

Single motherhood is more common than one might think.  According to resources there is an estimated 10.4 million single mothers in the USA alone, and average of 3.5% of the nation.  Many reasons for single motherhood exist up to and including simple divorce situations. Mothers make great leaders for this reason.  They are able to block out all obstacles existing for being a single parent and put their children's well being as a top priority. 

Mistakes are a common thing in today's world.  The fortunate part about mistakes is that you can learn from them.  As a single mother - we suggest staying this course.  Learn from mistakes that you might have made in the past and grow as a single mother out of the best interest of your baby. Don't be to hard on yourself as mistakes are part of life.  Simply learn from them.

Make your own path and make sure you take the one for yourself.  Forgive yourself for things that might bring you down and make sure to ask others to forgive you if you have harmed them in any way.  As a single mother you need no guilt riding on your shoulders. You need a clean positive slate to be the best leader you can be for your little baby.

Personal issues can interfere with everyday life.  Make sure you resolve them, but do it one at a time.  As if your issues you have were a checklist, and you are resolving them and checking them off one at a time. If you try and handle too much at one time nothing ever seems to get completed. 

Another piece of good advice is to make time for your own personal hobbies for relief and comfort.  Sufficient time to relax is necessary for mommies and important for you to do a good job as a parent.  Babies take naps, it is no secret.  When this time comes, sometimes twice a day as newborns, take action and relax.  Read a book, cook, paint, or do other things that simply allow for time to release negative energy and focus on rebuilding your mind and body.  Working out is another good release for negative pressure.

Enjoy your baby as a new mommy and a single mommy.  It might sound stupid, but he or she is going to be a product of you and you alone.  Someone said once, "they are only babies once, then they grow up".  Don't be too strict on yourself trying to be the perfect parent and allow yourself to enjoy the baby, as they love you the most.  They recognize who takes care of them, dresses them, feeds them, and spends time with them.  Enjoy it!  Make times for sleep, bathing, naps, eating, and playing fun.  A lot of time mommies view these times as chores for them, or simply responsibilities.  While they are chores and things you must do as a parent, babies will simply grow to dislike the times they need to do these things if you don't allow them to learn to enjoy it.  For example, bath time can simply be "let's take a bath" or it can be, "let's take a bubble bath with mommy!!".  Again, fun is good, and babies sense this in you as a parent.

Maintaining a relationship with God is also some good advice.  As a parent, it is important for you, and important for your child to grow up with a good foundation.  It does not matter what denomination you choose, just as long as you don't set the example that it is not a priority, and going to church is something you "have" to do.  Make it fun, interesting, and take advantage of the foundation it builds for your individual family. 

Educate yourself so that when questions come up from your two or three year old, you are able to answer them intelligently and explain it to them fully.

There are many more secrets to single motherhood.  The internet is a great resource for such research.  Great ideas come from brainstorming and collaboration.  Forum boards are a great way for asking challenging questions and learning how other single mothers in your position would handle them. 

Good luck and let us know how you're doing!